Understanding the Existential Crisis: From Disconnection to Discovery
The existential crisis is a topic that has perplexed and fascinated thinkers for centuries. This phenomenon, often seen as a hallmark of the human condition, plunges us into the depths of profound questioning about life, purpose, and the very nature of existence itself. Questioning our existence, why we are here, and how to make sense of our lives — this, I would say, is the most fundamental aspect to being human.
What is an Existential Crisis?
In our journey through life, we often encounter moments that challenge our understanding of who we are and what our place is. These moments, these deep and often unsettling realisations, are what we refer to as existential crises.
An existential crisis arises when an individual confronts certain fundamental aspects of their existence. It's not just about feeling lost or confused; it's about grappling with the very core questions of life itself. Questions like 'What is my purpose?', 'Can we ever truly know another person?', or 'How do we reconcile the freedom to choose with the constraints of society?
Historically, these questions have been the domain of philosophers. The term 'existential' traces its roots back to the existentialist movement, a school of philosophical thought that emerged in the 20th century. Thinkers like Søren Kierkegaard, Friedrich Nietzsche, and Jean-Paul Sartre, although differing in their approaches, all focused on individual existence and the concerns inherent in it. So, I'll briefly expand on these concepts to provide some context. There are really 4 main existential concerns that we all share.
Death: This represents the ultimate limitation of human existence. The awareness of mortality can evoke anxiety but also imposes this sense of urgency and significance to our life choices and actions. In this respect, the concern of death, is very closely related to our acute awareness of time.
Freedom and Responsibility: Existential freedom refers to the absence of external determinants, meaning we are free to choose and shape our own lives. This freedom, however, comes with the burden of responsibility. Recognising that we are the authors of both our actions and decisions can be motivating but also overwhelming.
Isolation: This concern addresses the fundamental aloneness of the individual. While we can share experiences with others, each person's existence is inherently separate. This realisation can lead to a deep understanding of personal identity and independence, but also feelings of loneliness and disconnection.
Meaninglessness: The search for meaning in a world that presents itself as indifferent to us, is a central existential concern. It involves the struggle to find or create purpose and significance in life. The fear that life might be inherently meaningless can lead to existential despair, but the pursuit of personal meaning can provide a sense of fulfilment and direction.
So when overwhelmed with these existential concerns, this is what is often referred to as an existential crisis. In the realm of psychology, an existential crisis is often portrayed to emerge during moments of significant life transitions, losses, or when facing the reality of our mortality. However, they can actually occur at any time of our lives, without any significant outward event.
Grappling With Existential Concerns
Although not a crisis, as soon as our minds are sufficiently developed, existential concerns are often continuously present, subtly effecting our present moment experiences, and importantly these unanswered existential concerns often worsen pre existing emotional disturbances. To be human is to be aware of our freedom and responsibility to make choices (which we can either bear or repress), it’s to be aware of our aloneness in our subjective experience, and it’s the inevitable struggle to find meaning in a world that offers no clear-cut answers.
So where an existential crisis can be seen as the extreme state of despair as it relates to existential concerns (which is only relevant in discrete circumstances), existential concerns, in and of themselves, are always relevant. A lack of why, no discrete responsibility, the feeling of being detached from the world we inhabit, if it isn’t the sole reason for our individual suffering, it certainly nails the coffin. But just as it is capable of ensuring the lowest of lows, it’s the one thing that makes humans also capable of reaching new heights. Whilst grappling with what exactly the point in all of this is, after emerging from this internal struggle-well it’s often the sole reason underlying the pursuit of greatness. The ‘thing’ that distinguishes us from animals, a driving force that motivates us to do things which go beyond merely surviving.
Meaning: The Antidote to Existential Concerns
It's my understanding, both from literature and clinical experience, that amongst the various existential concerns we face – such as freedom, isolation, and mortality – the quest for meaning stands out. It's not just another concern; it's a potential solution, a key that might unlock and alleviate the distress caused by other existential anxieties.
When we find ourselves living a life that does not align with our personal meaning- whether its doing a job you’re disinterested in, holding shallow relationships, having no concrete aspirations for the future, amongst many other things- well known existential thinker, neurologist and psychiatrist Viktor Frankl, the author of the best selling book ‘Mans Search for Meaning’ referred to this as the ‘existential vacuum’. A void, a space within us that unless filled with an outward meaning, invites inward tensions that come as a consequence of the associated self preoccupation, a kind of brooding on the current state of your life. Neurotic tendencies such as anxieties, depressions, obsessions, ruminations, and so on, come flooding in. This vacuum, I often see it in the individual who hasn’t even began to confront their own existential concerns. Hedonistic individuals, living in the pursuit of pleasure. Continually on this quest to arrive at a tensionless state- a state with no tension, no obstacles to overcome or missions to accomplish. But there is no such state. Because what often happens, is that those who are spared tension, well they often create it. But this inward tension, tension directed towards attempting to fulfil our own individual needs, well it often leads to the development of unhealthy emotional states. That is for the sole reason that we are existential beings, complex minds that are continually aware of our existence and the effect that we have on the world around us. We all want to be happy, but we don’t need to be happy. Instead, what we need is a reason to be happy. That reason is found when grappling with the existential concerns inherent in our nature, and specifically, confronting our own individual sense of meaning and purpose head on. We are not just animals that simply respond to stimuli in our environment, as it is our nature to also evaluate the meaning inherent in it.
Finding Our Unique Purpose
So having spoken on the importance of meaning, specifically identifying and perceiving ourselves as having purpose- if we feel we don’t have it, and burdened by this sense of meaningless- how do we go about finding it? Well firstly, by giving a nuanced answer to this, that professes to address everyone, would be contradicting both existential thought and the major contributor too our individual meaning, authenticity. There are however, some useful practical considerations to focus on, that apply to all.
First, it's vital to understand that meaninglessness often arises, not from a lack of meaning in life, but instead in our disconnection with it. To bridge this gap, a critical step is self-reflection. Introspection, yes, but it goes beyond that; it's a deep, structured exploration of our values, beliefs, and passions. Methods like guided journaling, where you answer specific questions about moments you found fulfilling or activities that deeply engaged you, can be instrumental. This process can really help distinguishing between external goals, often imposed by societal norms, and intrinsic goals that align with your deeper values. And having identified these you then set the stage for implementing 'value-driven goals'. Set small, achievable objectives that resonate with your core values and gradually build towards more significant, value-aligned ambitions. We often have become so lost into the demands of everyday, that it feels as if we have lost the ability to identify that which aligns with our sense of purpose. But I find that when doing something, whether its something your giving out in the form of service (say within a job), or receiving in the form of experience (say in the relationships you hold)- pay attention to the feeling it evokes in you. If an external demand, internally if it does not align with the values you hold, you may feel fear, anger, or even indifference and boredom. It’s what I describe as a general state of contraction. Conversely, when you’re immersed in something that evokes that sense of fulfilment, I describe it as a sense of dilation. You feel open, a state that is often attributed to being in a state of flow. A true state of mindfulness, whereby the inner chatter turns off. The ego state of feeling detached from the world dissolves, and you’re completely focused on the present moment experience.
Engaging in 'philosophical exploration' can also be enlightening. Read and reflect upon existential literature or philosophy. Authors like Viktor Frankl, Albert Camus, or even contemporary thinkers can offer insights into how others have navigated the search for meaning. A partially practical perspective you may grasp from this, is that grappling with the meaning of our lives as a whole is a thankless task. Just as you would subscribe meaning to a film before you finished watching it in its entirety- life is much the same way. But unlike a film, we are the architects of our own lives. Our choices, our actions, and our attitudes determine the course of our existence. This responsibility can feel overwhelming, but it's also liberating.
Lastly, if struggling consider 'therapeutic dialogue.' Sometimes, discussions with a therapist, especially one trained in existential therapy, can offer new angles and strategies to address feelings of meaninglessness. Strategies that are both specific to you and your individual circumstance.